AN EVER EVOLVING SELF-PORTRAIT

 

FOREVER UNDER
CONSTRUCTION

CERTAIN ELEMENTS

ARE CLICKABLE 

IT'S UP TO YOU

TO FIND OUT WHICH ONE.

BY CEDRIC VELDHUIS

 WHAT WOULD I TAKE WITH ME IF MY HOUSE WOULD CATCH FIRE AND I HAD TO FLEE?  //

 

I DIRECTLY THOUGHT ABOUT MY HARDDRIVES AND LAPTOP WHICH CONTAIN A LOT OF MY WORKS AND MOST OF MY FAVORITE 

DOCUMENTATIONS OF MY LIFE.

OF-COURSE MY CAMERA'S WOULD COME NEXT ACCOMPANIED BY MY ENVELOPE OF FAVORITE CHILDHOOD PHOTO'S, ALSO REALLY IMPORTANT MY PHONE, KEYS AND WALLET.. FUCK! WHAT ABOUT MY CHARGERS, MY BUSHCRAFT KNIVE OR SOMETHING TO KEEP ME WARM AND DRY.. I COULD GO ON LIKE THAT..

 

NAMING ALL THESE "THINGS"..  I UNDERSTOOD  THAT ALL OF THEM ARE IMPORTANT TO ME. BUT IF I REALLY HAD TO CHOOSE BETWEEN ALL OF THEM I COULDN'T PICK JUST "ONE"

WHICH ONE OF THEM PROVIDES EVERYTHING I NEED? WHICH ONE EMBODIED ALL OF MY NEEDS AND EXPERIENCE'S ALL AT ONCE?

I REALISED IT WAS NEITHER OF THE THINGS I NAMED.

 

 

 

 

 
 
 
 

THAT WHAT I DEEMED MOST IMPORTANT,

THAT WHAT EMBODIES ALL OF MEMORIES,

THAT WHAT SYMBOLISES EVERYTHING I STAND FOR, THAT WHAT IS ABLE TO REMIND ME ABOUT PAST,PRESENT AND FUTURE?

 

THAT,

THAT IS ME!

MY BODY, MY BEING!

AND ONLY BY THIS CONSCIOUS DISCOVERY I REALISED THAT I FORGOT TO LIVE CONSCIOUSLY. I WAS LIVING MY LIFE WITH A FUNDAMENTAL WRINKLE.

I HAD UNKNOWINGLY MADE MYSELF DEPENDENT OF CONSUMERISM. PRODUCTS, ENTERTAINMENT SERVICES AND CONSUMPTIONS DICTATED MY PERCEPTION OF THE QUALITY OF MY LIFE.

 

THIS IS MY WAY OF RECONSTRUCTING WHAT HAPPEND AND HOW I CAN CHANGE THIS TOXIC HABBIT..